Writing to your living donor

By letter, card or email - We're here to support you

Key points

Communication is not expected, but is appreciated by living donors
We understand that there are many reasons why some transplant recipients feel unable to write
Your donor will be able to choose when to open your correspondence, at a time that is right for them
It’s never too early or late to write

Before you start

Writing to the family of a donor who donated after death?

There is a separate process for this.

See how it works

Jump to a section

Why write? What is the process? Where to send your correspondence

Why write?

Writing to your anonymous living donor or to someone who has donated to you as part of the UK Living Kidney Sharing Scheme is often very much appreciated.

We understand that writing your letter, card or email can be a very emotional and challenging experience and we're here to support you.

Watch our video to hear from people who have written and received letters themselves.

Both sides of the story

Jade sent a letter to her anonymous living donor to thank them for her second chance. Celia and Sanjiv both donated a kidney to someone on the transplant waiting list anonymously. Shortly after donating, Celia received a letter of thanks.

What is the process?

Write your letter, card or email. Avoid sharing any information that would make you personally identifiable
Your correspondence will be read by the living donor coordinator, to check it doesn’t reveal identifiable information
A photocopy is kept on file for future reference
The living donor coordinator will match your correspondence with your donor
Your living donor will be told that your correspondence is available to them
If your donor wishes to receive your correspondence, it will be forwarded in a separate envelope to be opened at their discretion

What to write

Things to consider

Feel free to include information about your social life, hobbies, children or partner if you would like to.

If you are a transplant recipient, you don't need to explain how you came to need a transplant to your living donor unless you want to.

If you cannot find words of your own, we have some suggestions that may help you with what you want to say.

Download our suggested wording (PDF, 62KB)

What not to include

Your correspondence with your living donor should not contain any identifiable information, such as:

Your surname
Your address, or the name of your town or city
Your place or company of work
The name of the hospital in which the donation or transplant took place

This is to ensure both you and your donor are able to remain anonymous.

Breaking anonymity

If you would like your donor to know your identity, you can make a request through your living donor coordinator. Your donor can do the same but neither of you are under any pressure to say yes.

If both you and your donor agree to break anonymity, contact details can be exchanged between you both, through your living donor coordinators.

Where to send your correspondence

By post

If you are posting your letter or card to your living donor coordinator, please include the following details on a separate sheet of paper to your main message:

Your full name
Your date of birth
The date of your transplant
The type of transplant you received
The hospital where your transplant took place

This information will not be passed on to your living donor but is needed to match the correct records.

By email

If you are sending a letter via email, please send it as an attachment to your living donor coordinator.

Please make sure you include the following details in the email itself:

Your full name
Your date of birth
The date of your transplant
The type of transplant you received
The hospital where your transplant took place

This information will not be passed on to your living donor but is needed to match the correct records.

Further support

For recipients of living donor transplants

For living donors

It is important to respect confidentiality and privacy on both sides and, particularly soon after a transplant, your recipient will be adjusting to a new way of life, medications and regime of hospital appointments.

They may wish to write but not have the space or time to do so and/or may feel unable to find the right words.

However, if you have not heard from your recipient and you would like to write a letter to them, please discuss this with your living donor coordinator who will be able to advise you.